Category Archives: honesty

Today We Talked About Racism

 

img_1363.jpgMy 14 year old and 16 year old daughters received gifts from one of their Aunties for Christmas. Its a sweatshirt that represents the beauty it is to be black. Its a sweatshirt from Black Republic & Company that says on the front, “I’m Black Whats Your Super Power?” It’s a shirt that uplifted my daughters spirits throughout the many racist comments made daily.

Now me, I am the parent that has all types of activism shirts that I wear in the concession stands at the high school football games. I have shirts that stand with Planned Parenthood, the LGBT community, and several that stand for Black Lives Matter! NO ONE and I mean NO ONE has come for me. But today, this little boy broke my 14 year old daughters heart and scared her. He told her “I know what my Super Power is, its making a noose.”

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Pause. This little boy said a noose… like wrap around a black persons neck and hang them – noose, strange fruit – noose. Really? Deep breath!

First of all – the amount of curse words and closed fist punches to the throat I thought of doing to this kid, but I had to calm down, explain the situation to my child about the evil words of those who do not like us, even though they have no reason. I struggled to control myself, that was not just a racist comment, but a threat to my child’s life. Thats how I took it, and I have every intent to treat it like that.

Before I could even say I would be at the school the next morning, she said the Principal will not take reports of racism, he will send you to the Assistant Principal. The same one who acts like she doesn’t know that racism exists, even though she’s black. I wish they would say the sweatshirt is the problem, I will have every black person I know with the same hoodie on protesting on their front lawns. The problem is someone’s parent taught them that it was ok to disrespect my child who is black. The problem is that the leader of this country has racist people opening their mouths again like we will not beat the shit out of them.

Let me catch my breath.

Screenshot 2018-01-29 17.38.40But how do you talk to your child about racism? About the symbolism of the noose? How do you make them feel safe in a community that is only sprinkled with a few black faces? How do you make them feel like their skin is not the problem, but the ignorance of the others are. How when they hear these comments from more than just one little privileged white boy.

I always push unity, but we cannot begin to talk unity until we admit and acknowledge that racism is still alive and growing in 2018!

2018!!!! 

I had the talk, you know the talk that was on Grey’s Anatomy last week, the talk that was on a few commercials that white people everywhere was upset about. The talk that EVERY black parent has had with their child. The talk that explains to her that there is no escaping this, no matter where we go racism is there. We cannot hide the color of our skin, but we can fight so we never let another person make us feel like she felt today. You know the one white people don’t want to admit is real, because then they would have to admit that RACISM IS REAL! Its real and its hurtful. I never thought I would have to explain this today, Arkansas once again, I hyped you up and once again, I have been disappointed.

To complain with me call Cleveland County Superintendent Johnnie L Johnson at (870) 325-6344

You’re Miserable Because of YOU!

You know that one friend that always talks negative, always has a lot going on and you know when you answer that phone that its going to be another sad story… 

If you don’t, then honey you are that friend and you definitely need to keep reading. Screenshot 2017-09-14 22.28.03

See I have this friend that always is in a bad relationship, I keep telling her that if you don’t learn from a situation you are doomed to repeat it, but honey I don’t want to keep hearing you complain about them. But what do you do? How do you tell someone to stop with the dramatics.

I have started working on my karmic energy and charging and cleansing my chakras but that ole mean ass heffa, the one that is blunt and no nonsense comes out every so often to drop some knowledge on some pitiful soul.

GIRL YOU ARE YOUR OWN MISERY!!!

If every situation is the same, you keep meeting and dating the same people, everyone is making you mad then its time to stop pointing fingers and start looking at yourself. Everyone in the world is not off, it could be your ass. Sit down, stay single learn yourself and then get back out there.

Sometimes we rush to find the one that we mistake a “right now” for a “lifetime”. Uh uh, I have learn from that mistake and have happily been single for a good minute and I am learning a lot because of it.

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Stop being that friend, if its you and if its not put that ass on do not disturb and relax.

-If no one has told you they love you today, know that I do! 

Jay Z, Jay Z, Jay Z… Boy You Still Got It!

Review Time!!!!  Review - Wooden 3d rendered letters/message

So after debating in my head since the debut of 4:44 whether I was going to redo my membership for Tidal, Facebook made me aware that Jay had snuck his new album to iTunes this morning. Best part was, my Apple Music Membership covered it! 

Let me tell you, I have been a Jay-Z fan since I was pregnant with my youngest daughter Screenshot 2017-07-07 20.33.16in 2001 and even before. So my review is probably biased. Not really, cause if Jay would’ve come out with something whack I would’ve called him out.

But this man doesn’t know what whack is, unless you are him describing how he almost pulled a Eric Benet and lost his woman. Now that was indeed whack.

See most people only hear that he admits to all the things that Lemonade was talking about, but they missed the greatness of his album just as they missed the best parts of Beyonce’s albums.

He starts with Kill JayZ spitting on how theres no healing what you hide. He spoke on every rumor and every bad thing he ever did, how he couldn’t take it if he wound up like Future watching another man play ball with his son.

But that wasn’t the best part of the album and if thats all you heard, then you need to listen until you hear the rest. JayZ spoke up on how it doesn’t matter how rich you are, what complexion you are that we are still niggas in their eyes. He talked about how OJ said he wasn’t black he was OJ and how quick they brought him back to reality.

How our so called leaders are dealing with crap like Bill Cosby being held on charges instead of them saying NBC wasn’t for sale. Look at Al Sharpton on IG taking selfies in the mirror, what is he fighting? He’s given up. (Of course you have to look up what Al Sharpton had to say in return.. all I can do is roll my eyes. He always has so much to say but still saying nothing, but thats a different story.)

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My jam is Family Feud, because in this song he speaks about how nobody wins if the family is feuding. He’s not speaking about his family, he’s speaking on our Black family and how we are at each others throats, drinking alcohol that we know is not ours.

He also spoke on how all these “new” rappers/niggas is starting to sound alike, taking pics on IG with money and guns that don’t belong to them. Hanging with chicks who look the same or are the same. How now we in the game of telling on ourselves and it really don’t be about nothing.

He talked about having credit is better than balling out, how you need to put money away for your family and invest in black owned businesses and stop working for everyone else. Like honestly, why are yal still signing record deals like you haven’t seen what they do to people. Stop making other peoples pockets fatter while all along you hungry.

He also spoke on deeper issues about him growing up with a mother who was living a life where she was hiding who she was. How you should your life to make you happy, no matter who doesn’t like it. He even called out the jewelers on how they are robbing people and don’t care even if its blood money, long as its money.

He wrapped it up with a song called Legacy and a shot out to his roots Marcy Me.

JayZ is back yal! He’s a grown man and is ready to face his responsibilities like a man and make his woman happy. He sees his flaws and his imperfections and hopefully will learn from them. Because as he said no loss is a loss its a lesson and appreciate the pain because its a blessing.

Lets hope this album will be the turning point that will allow him to keep that superhero mask on for his babies. Good Job Jay!!! This is now on my favs list. Whats your favorite JayZ album?

Any discrimination is unacceptable!

-Isms… I’m done with them all.

Why is it that is you stand for one thing you can’t stand for something else. In America, there is a thing called privileged but if you are not a straight white male, you don’t know the true meaning of that word, nor does it pertain to you.

I know some believe that all white people have a privilege attached to them, but if they were born with a vagina, that is simply not true. If that are attracted to the same sex, its not true.

I can feel my ancestors kicking me in my back and a few stares from my black peers. Yes racism is strong, and yes our black people are being killed in these streets for being a color that they cannot control. But its not just us. As much as we want to fight for equality, we should also hear the next persons complaints on why they are oppressed.IMG_7128

There are latinos who are still getting stereotyped in Hollywood and called Mexicans, no matter what country the originate from. They are portrayed as a sex symbol and men definitely don’t respect their women. For all points and purposes they are treated like our black men and women.

Asians, Muslims and Jewish are all disrespected. Women are disrespected, as well as the LGBT community.

We are all dying for the same rights. We are all fighting the same fight. Why can we not fight together?

I had a friend, whom out of respect I will remain nameless, who debated with me and thought because I was speaking up that I was only speaking up for the LGBT community. As if my blackness and me being a woman was thrown out the window because I am a member of that community. Last time I check I am still black, I am still a woman.

I have three strikes against me according to the current administration, so why do I have to pick one over the other to stand up for? I stand for justice for all. IMG_7194

Today I am pissed for several reasons and one is the results of the Philando Castile murder. He was murdered as a friend put it but we just don’t know who. Apparently the video his girl posted wasn’t enough for a conviction. The screams from her and his daughter wasn’t enough to put a man in jail for shooting his weapon in cold blood.

I am angry because a year after the Pulse shooting, people still have the nerve to think that we deserved it because we are sinners. As if their best friends sleeping with their husbands wasn’t a sin. As if the kids they had out of wedlock and the pointing fingers and judging others wasn’t the same. I am angry that people are using the Bible, the word of God, as a means to spread hate.

I am angry that Amber Rose posted a racy picture in honor of the annual Slut Walk and all people could do was call her the very thing she’s standing up against. Her biggest haters were women who wish they could post a picture of the same or who do but hate that she added a feminist words to it. A woman body is objectified daily and looked at as a means of sexual gratification whether we allow it or not. If she was topless it would be a problem, if she only showed thigh, it would still be a problem.

I am angry that everyone in the world is worried so much about how others live their lives that they will ruin their own to make someone else miserable. Gay marriage was voted in federally to be allowed in the United States and it has been a fight ever since. If two men get married how is it bothering your daily life? If two women are raising children in a household of love, why is that harmful but your house full of abuse and hatred isn’t?

I am tired of the hatred in this country, in this world. I feel like the current administration gave people who are filled with hate a platform to express it. Yes there is freedom of speech, but why is it ok for you to disrespect me, but not ok for me to respond? Even if nothing I said is laced with hatred.

America is no where near being great, I have no idea what era Trump was talking about. It seems to me that America is hate. Everyone is hating everyone else, yet everyone is fighting for the same thing. Respect!

The best way to get respect is to look internally and start respecting yourself. Then and only then will you gain respect of others.

What Do You REALLY Expect?

Be honest when you get in a relationship what do you want? Many will answer this and say someone with their life together, a good job, their own place and a vehicle of some kind. Now that’s all good, but what about the person? What do you expect from the person for you to remain happy with that person? Not the normal, communicates with me, makes me laugh, faithful and honest. But what about the deeper things that you need to feel secure in your relationship?
Many people don’t think about this until they are stuck in a relationship that isn’t working. Maybe your girlfriend is too flirty and you can’t take that, or maybe your boyfriend is a little too friendly online. What is it that is dire in a relationship that you wouldn’t think to question until its too late?
For me its security, I need to know that not only will I be physically be safe with you, but I need to know that emotionally I will be safe with you. I do not like to be made into a fool by other people. I like for our problems to be our problems. Don’t get me wrong, I have my people I vent to (all close friends that know how I am and gives me honest views without judging) and I expect the person I am with to have the same. But I mean social media shouldn’t know our problems, ex-girlfriends shouldn’t have the opportunity to comment on our issues via Facebook, Twitter or Instagram.
I also need to be given attention and affection. I am a very affectionate person. I know that everyone else is not as affectionate as I am, but I expect to be shown how much I am appreciated through a kiss, a passionate touch or even a sexy glance. I am lucky to 
What about you? What do you appreciate or disagree with in a relationship? These are the things that you should inquire about when you are in the dating stages. That way you know that you will be fulfilled in all aspects of your relationship. There is nothing worse than someone who has a good man/good woman but drags them hell because they are not completely happy.

Just note every bad relationship teaches you a little more about what you want from a relationship AND helps you to appreciate the one when it comes along.